18 days left !

Damn time's passing by so fast! I mean it feels like just yesterday when I turned 18 and today people are getting ready for Christmas! Next Friday (Thursday since Friday is optional) will be my last day of school for this semester and next semester won't start until 11 January. God bless our principal!
15,16,18,19,20 I'll be working at the post office sorting people's Christmas greeting cards night shift (22.30-06.00) so that people can recieve them in time for Christmas.

I love this time of the year, everything just gets so cosy. People stay at home and do things together inside to avoid the cold and all the snow. Watching TV, playing scrabble and drinking hot cocoa! This season it's not only spiritual and commercial it's also social. Families and friends get together to celebrate something they don't really know the real meaning of (very few do remember it even though they know it), what makes it important to them is the good cooking and the opportunity to spend time together.

During the winter holidays I'm planning to work a lot, maybe 75% and the other 25% I'll try to study and work out. (100% = 40 hours/week) Which means I'd still have plenty of time to do everything else.
Sounds great, doesn't it? =)

Since I finished my arabic task I only have one obstacle left to tackle this week, physics urrrghhh I hate it from the deepest parts of my heart!  WIsh me good luck, my exam will be on Friday and on Wednesday I'll be having the writing, listening, english in use and reading exam for my CAMBRIDGE CERTIFICATE (or is it diploma? Certificate sounds better) all day. Good luck for all of those who will be writing the same exam as me on Wednesday =)

NIGHTYYYYYYYYY!

Checking in!

Hello everyone!
I bet you missed me, it's been a long while since I last updated. Don't worry I'm alive. It's just that I've been so busy lately with my new job, finals and trying to make time for gym and friends/family. This Saturday we had a Barbara Party with the lebanese association.(Lebanese Halloween, more of a Christian holiday) I made it succesful by being the controlfreak I can be sometimes and as a result I havent been abe to speak since. I lost my voice, at the end of the party I was so hoarse that my words didn't make sence. Everyone felt sorry for me, which was so great. I got taken care of just like when I was a kid. And my job doesn't help much since I work with telemarketing I have to talk a lot on the phone and I must have overstrained my voice or something. (and I have been talking a lot lately, ask Vania and Tina. I've been told to shut up multiple times. It's not my fault that I've got a lot to say!!)

Anyways, I'm almost done buying Christmas presents.. I've only got dad's left and I have no idea what to get him. Last year I got him a really nice sweater from US polo and he still loves it. It's his favorite so it's going to be hard to top that this year! I mean getting him a tie, socks or underwear would be such a cliché, dont you think?

I should go do my arabic homework, I've got a complete A4 ahead of me to translate.. shoot me :S and maybe if I'm feeling good I'll do something about the physics test.

Why do I give valuable time, to people who don't care if I live or die

There are just so many people in my life who fit in in my headline so perfectly. Some of them I don't care much about. My philosophy is that if someone showes me interest in being my friend, you are very welcome to stay and I will do anything in my power to keep you and be your back up no matter what, but as soon as I notice that you've been disrespecting me and don't really care if I'm in your life or not, that's when I erase you from everything. My memories, my life and most important my future. Don't waste your time on someone who doesn't deserve it, someone who doesn't appreciate it because like I said you would be wasting your time on something unimportant when you could actually do something useful, like actually putting all the energy on someone who needs it and appreciates it. Sometimes you have what you need right infront of you, looking at it is easy but actually seeing it is a lot harder.

Hatred isn't really the word, insignificant.. that's the word for you!

I just realised how long my blogposts are. I'm so sorry guys, I'm gonna try to make my point in less words, but sometimes it's just so hard because I really want everyone to understand and I just feel like I have so much to say.

LOL, I like this Kind of humor. Would you like me to post some jokes from time to time?

Nightyyyy !

There's just too much of your ego ...

I have officially had a great day with friends and family. No boys, no problems. Everything's just going like it's supposed to. The toodering went better than I expected and I actually remembered a lot more than I thought I could. I got to drive with mom to my driving school and she even picked me up and drove me to the gym where I met up with my brother Joe, my friend Vania and her sister Dalia and my cousin Nancy. We worked out and laughed so much for two amazing hours that my stomach is still hurting. Vania's mom was so nice, she picked us up and drove us all the way home. I love parents, they make your life so much easier, though they could be such a pain in the ass sometimes. But that's only because they have your best at heart.

Right now I'm chilling with my mom, dad and Joe trying to solve some problems while watching a movie and drinking vanilla tea. I really love those moments when we really feel like a family. Since dad works a lot during the week, we only have Sundays to sit down the whole family and enjoy a good meal. But evn those days we have to go to church and I have my meetings for the Lebanese assosiation. In case you don't know any lebanese people, they love to visit eachother and sit down for hours and talk and just be together. My dad is just that kind of person, he loves people so much , while me and my brother prefer to rest and stay in and just chill out. What I wanted you to understand is that we don't see eachother much in this family even though we live under the same roof.

Have a wonderful night ! Love ..


A picture of a few girls who mean a lot to me! Tommorow we're gonna party :D



When you left, it was like a huge hole was punched out of my chest...

Thank you God for making the rain stop when I went to sleep last night. I had a great night's sleep for once. I fell asleep as soon as I put my head on the pillow which is very unusual of me. Usually I lay in bed for at least half and hour thinking. I think about the day that has passed, upcoming events, I even dream myself away before I fall asleep. Everything I wish could happen in real life happens during these minutes before I fall asleep.
It's a lot better that dreaming in your sleep because you can decide everything that's going to happen. Dreaming in my sleep to me is like watching a movie, you can't steer anything in the direction you want it to go. For example, last week I had a nightmare and what I hate the most in horror movies is that those stupid girls (often blondes for some reason) walk towards the boogeyman or whateve instead of running away. They try to call 911 from their landline phone instead of using their cellphone. The killer can't turn off the coverage on the phone, but he could easily cut the landline. Anyways in my nightmare I acted exactly like those girls and i think you could figure out what happened to me next.. I got killed.

My dream is to live on the seaside somewhere tropical. What is your dream?

Since I slept this well, I don't even remember dreaming. i usually dream a lot and when I wake up I remember 2-3 of my dreams. In general people remember 1-2 dreams, but people with a bit stronger memory remember a bit more. I have a partial photographic memory and it helps me a lot with my schoolwork. Sometimes I only have to look through a text once and remember 70% of it. Lucky me, yeah I know. But sometimes I overestimate my memory, that's when it doesn't go so well. Always read whatever you're reading an extra time or two because it really makes a difference.

I woke up at 9 and did some maths and read through my religion book. Finally we're having something I already know. Judaism, Christianity and Islam. Going to a Roman Catholic school for 9 years really makes a difference when it comes to  knowledge in religion.

My friend will be here anytime soon, wish me good luck! I really hope I'm going to be a good tooderer in chemistry. In general I'm good at explaining things but I easily get distracted and start talking about something else and I hate to repeat over and over again in case someone doesn't understand.

I'm not the girl you're taking home

This is what I looked like today. Green top from Gina (which I haven't had on since last year, or the year before that). Jeans from Gina. Triwa watch-campadre and a bracelet from SNÖ. and the necklace I'm wearing is very special to me. I got it from my little brother Joe on my 18th birthday and I've had it on ever since.

Just finished watching gossip girl, This was really a great episode where Chuck and Blair finally did what I've been wanting them to do all the time. Chuck's the man! Maybe he was a little too rough, but that must be the result of a long wait. Anywayss...

Our one and only (Swedish) Robyn gave a performance on Blair Waldorfs 20th birthday on Gossip Girl singing Hang With Me.

 

I met my mentor and we had a great time. It was really cosy and for once it was so nice to have someone to talk to about anything. Everything from serious futurplans to silly thoughts. What I like about her is that she really listens and gives the best answers she can. The fact that a grown up woman with family and children has very much in common with an 18-year old girl in highschool astonishes me. We didn't set up a date for the next get-together but it should be sometime by the end of this month. Maybe we could go bowling, visiting a museum, taking a drink, having dinner, visiting Christmas at Liseberg, Iceskating.. anything that involves a lot of fun and ofcourse some kind of inspiration to our conversations. I look forward to meeting her family sometime and having them over at our place so that my parents can feel better about me meeting with a "strange" woman. She's not that strange to me anymore.

Good morning Guantanamo Bay! I've just committed a crime ...

My favorite Disney-princess:
 Princess Jasmine from Aladdin

I turned on the computer while waiting for my breakfast to be ready instead of reading through my english tast. Shame on me! I'm making a melt mozarella cheese sandwich with tomatoes, onions, olives and oregano. The mere thought of it makes my mouth water and for the boys I'm making pancakes again. They don't eat anything but pancakes with nutella! Joe, the older one has started to like salami out of the blue and no one's aloud to touch his food in the fridge. He put up a note saying: You touch, You die !! :@ 



I didn't go to the gym this morning because I felt so tired and I needed to go back to sleep and rest, but that doesn't mean I'm skipping my daily exercise. I'll just have to go somewhere between studying and meeting my mentor.

Something's smelling awfully goood in the oven, I'm gonna go check on it... Before I go I have to thank you all for visiting my blog. It has already become more successful than the old one and I hope my writing will keep you interested.

Enjoy this grey and rainy day !

What's wrong with people these days??

Picture of me and some of my closest girlfriends on my 18th birthday, Love you guys and thank you for making my life so much better! ♥

All of the sudden I don't feel well and maybe I should go to bed and just skip CSI. If I do go to sleep now, I'll be able to wake up early and go to the gym around 8 which means I'll be able to do a lot of things before noon!

Since I didn't study much today I'll have to make sure to do as much as possible tomorrow before 6 p.m. At 7 I'm meeting my mentor at Café Vanilla. I'm so nervous about it. She's a very important engineer at Volvo and I hope that my relation to her will help me and give me connections to other important people. Last time we spoke she insisted on taking me with her to work so that I can learn more about engineering and Volvo. Hopefully the visit will help me decide what I want to do in the future. I'm going to try to get an internship at Sahlgrenska Sjukhuset (a famous hospital in Gothenburg) When I was younger I dreamt of becoming a doctor. Not really a doctor, I meant surgeon. A specific kind of surgeon, a neurosurgeon but I think I could settle with cardio.

Last week at "Mitt Liv" (My Life) a programme for women, we talked a lot about dreams and finding them. We focused very hard on that part and the instructor kept telling us to never back down on our dreams. We should follow them no matter what and just stay positive because the attitude you have towards something is very important. Even though I think that my dream is unreachable and so far away, I find working on getting everything the way I want it to be a lot more satisfying than settling for something descent but not encouraging. I don't want to become one of those people who live a monotone life and feel like my existence has no meaning. I want to be passionate about something and I don't want it to be love. I've given up on trying to make myself happier with love to/from a guy, because sooner or later all relationships break and you'll be on your on.

From now on people will be able to walk in and out of my life whenever they want. I'm not even going to try to make anyone stay around. "If you love something let it go and if it comes back thats how you know..." Marques Houston.  Everyone's welcome to enter, but also free to leave whenever they feel like it.

I should really get going before I get too attached to my new blog. (I already am, LOL)
I'm just gonna wish you all a good night, may the angels watch over you!

I did the most dangerous thing I could when I said I love you..

Question of the day: What do you do when you love someone and they have hurt you but you still want them in your life though they haven't gained your trust? You want to forgive them, but you're just not ready to let go of everything thats been bothering you for so long.. You tell them that everything is allright, but is it? They say that Amor Vincit Omnia, I really hope it does because I've been there done that.. don't want to go back unless I know somethings gonna change ...

Now Hollywood wants to make you think they know what love is.

But I'm a tell you what true love is.
Love is not what you see in the movies.
Its not the ecstasy, its not what you see in that scene
you know what I mean?
I'm telling you right now, true love is sacrifice.
Love is thinking about others before you think about yourself
Love is selfless not selfish. Love is God and God is love.
Love is when you lay down your life for another
Whether for your brother, your mother, your father or your sister
Its even laying down your life for your enemies,
That's unthinkable, but think about that
Love is true
Think.

Crash and Burn

I miss you girls! <3

Today I'm feeling good! I've got this energy out of nowhere and everything feels so great. I woke up around 7 and went to my drivingschool, I did so much better that the last time I was there. (I was so mad and stressed that day and it totally destroyed my session)

After driving like a pro I went to the gym and worked out for 2 hours. I've got to look great on New Year and most important on my prom!

Right now I'm at home babysitting my little brother Jonathan and Joe who's totally useless. He never does anything when I'm around. He relies on me too much. I just made them a vegetarian pasta with mushrooms and mozarella and Jonathan got his Nutella pancakes which he can't seem to be able to live without.

I should try to finish my Swedish essay, analysis and speach.. later !

Happy Halloween !!

Hello people! Guess who's back ??

I just felt like blogging again and if you guys remember I was so sick of my old blog. It was just so pinkish! Anyway as soon as i figure out how to change the design I'm gonna do something fierce, something more like me. Pink is so out! BLACK is the shit!
I kind of already feel at home on this blog and what makes it even better is the fact that it's linked to my igoogle-account!

Since I'm graduating this year you will be hearing about graduation, prom, dresses, plans for the future and my plans for next summer which will change every five minutes since I have no idea of what I want to do. One second I want to stay in Sweden and become a civil engineer and all of teh sudden I want to go abroad and become a surgeon.

I hope you'll like the new me and my new blog.. welcome and enjoy the ride !